Life May Not Be Easy, but It Doesn’t Have To Be Miserable
To the deep thinkers,
Welcome to the Deep Thinkers Newsletter: A collection of essays dedicated to going beyond the surface.
If you’re new here, check out the Deep Thinkers archive.
One of my favorite anime series, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood taught me a fundamental lesson early in my life. That is—life isn't easy, but all we can do is keep moving forward.
In one of the earlier episodes of the series, the main character, Edward Elric has a somber conversation with another character named Rose. Rose is a tragic figure who has known nothing but suffering her entire life. She grew up alone, with no parents to care for her. Then her boyfriend (the very person who'd pulled Rose out of her despair) dies in an accident.
Soon after, a man masquerading as a priest arrives in Rose's town and manipulates her into believing he can revive her deceased boyfriend. Desperate and with nowhere else to place her faith, Rose becomes a dedicated follower of the false priest.
When this fraud is exposed by Edward and his brother Alphonse, Rose loses the speck of hope she has left. Her life as a disciple had brought meaning back to her life. She'd had a tough life. She was a decent person. Yet here she was once again, searching, grasping, for a reason to keep on living.
Rose, desperate for an answer, looked to Edward.
What does she do now?
Edward tells her:
Walk on your own. Move forward. You've got a good strong pair of legs, Rose. You should get up and use them.
Not Edward, or anyone else for that matter could give Rose the answers she longed for. She simply had to keep moving forward.
You probably know just how difficult life can be. The weight of it all can seem like too much to bear sometimes. You wonder if you have what it takes to keep going. You’re exhausted. You take two steps forward and then three steps back. You wonder, what’s the point? The words of encouragement and platitudes from friends and family don’t do it anymore.
When it feels like we can’t muster any more hope, how do we get up and move forward?
Running from your problems
You can't hide from life's problems forever. To cower is to guarantee you won't have the strength necessary to handle even the slightest obstacle. The kind of obstacle that is often followed by another and then another, in a successive fury.
Yes, confronting your problems head-on can be terrifying. Yes, it would feel better if we never had to struggle. But this is the world we live in, one that is unforgiving and will test you time and time again.
I've often found myself hoping, and praying, for someone to rescue me from my suffering. I've lost count of how many times I thought a crisis in my life would break me. Still, I endure. Why? Because giving up on myself is never an option.
How many burdens did you think would crush you? Think about where you've been, all that you've overcome, all that you've survived. You've had to move through the pain with only a little hope and almost no direction. Yet you persist.
This is what makes humans so amazing. We suffer through 20 straight losses only to return for round 21.
Ready to try again. Ready to get a win.
Human tenacity
Humans are tenacious beings. We possess this trait from birth. Have you ever watched a toddler learn to walk? One of the most difficult things we’ll ever learn to do in our lives—and we fall again and again.
And then we get up... again and again.
That tenacious spirit of a toddler is what we all need. We don't get everything right the first time around. That’s life. You will, until the day that you move on from this world, have to get up again and again.
You will have to dust yourself off and continue forward. Because to sit where you've fallen merely hoping that things get better on their own, is a slower and much more painful end than trying and failing.
Life isn't about running and hiding. It's about moving forward. It's about enduring the hardships and becoming a better version of yourself on the other side.
Like Walt Disney once said:
All the adversity I’ve had in my life, all my troubles and obstacles, have strengthened me… You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you.
For the love of wisdom and joy
As you live different doors (or opportunities) will open. Will you choose the doors that lead down the path of least resistance? Or will you walk through the doors that will make you a better person?
To face the discomfort rather than running—that is where wisdom is earned, where strength is forged, and the true meaning of joy becomes crystal clear.
Yes, life can be very painful. Through practice, however, you can learn to control your state of mind in the middle of the chaos. You choose the story you tell after the storm has settled. Will it be a story of tragedy or triumph?
It’s tough to accept, but an easy life was never promised. We are at the mercy of an indifferent universe. But it’s not the suffering alone that breaks us; it’s the meaningless suffering that does. When you can see the why behind the pain, you can endure anything.
Start by developing your own sense of awareness. Notice the moments when identify as a victim. Remember, that you are not your circumstances. Things are rarely as bad as we perceive them to be. You are stronger than you know and you’ve endured too much to feel like this is the moment it all crumbles away.
Everything you go through can teach you something—about yourself, other people, or the world. If you lose, learn the lesson. Then dust yourself off and keep on walking.
The road less traveled
The more you confront and conquer your problems, the stronger you become.
Have ambitions. Chase your dreams. Try new things. Take risks. Pursue personal growth.
The joy of life is in pushing your limits and pursuing meaningful goals. It's not supposed to be easy. That’s the point. Anything worth having will cost you something.
If you can make peace with the fact that life will hurt sometimes and you apply your efforts to working in service of something meaningful (whatever that means to you), the price you pay will be well worth it.
When you make your life about extracting the lesson in everything you go through, you’ll be one of the few who understand how to walk with grace in the middle of a chaotic world.
The pain we go through is part of our humanity. It’s in our tenacity that we survive. And it’s thanks to those moments of pain, that we can appreciate the pockets of bliss.
I’ll leave you with this quote from the book Upgrade, a novel about a man whose evolution into a higher kind of being grants him the ability to wall off his emotions.
Despite this ability, he allows his feelings (even the negative ones) to slip through his defenses—understanding that if he loses his tether to these emotions, he loses whatever amount of humanity he has left in him.
The urge to wall myself off from the ache is acute. But I want to feel it. If I lose the ability to hurt, I also lose my grasp on joy—those brief moments of contentment that make consciousness worth the voyage.
What stood out to me this week:
On doing what you want:
There is no doing nothing with your life.
There is only doing what you want, or doing what others want for you.
And if you choose the latter, your life becomes more and more mechanical until it is near impossible to escape.
- Dan Koe, Learn This Skill If You Want To Stay Relevant In 10 Years
On your passion bringing out another side of you:
On the one hand, in the community, I really am an establishment kind of guy; on the other hand, in the marketplace, I have always been a maverick who enjoys shaking things up and creating a little anarchy. And sometimes the establishment has made me mad.
- Sam Walton, Sam Walton: Made in America
You may be one way, but when you find the thing you know you’re supposed to be doing—when your purpose and passion take hold of you—you transform into someone completely different. Some transform for the better. Some for the worst. Regardless, it’s that other side of you who is willing to do what it takes to bring your dreams to life. So let them take over and see what you’re capable of building.
🎵Song of the week:
Thank you for your time—feel free to let me know how this post resonated with you or share it with a friend.
This is genuinely inspiring, I loved this. I'll certainly be reading more of your works.
A beautiful message❤️