Be delusional
Believe in the power of your dreams
To the deep thinkers,
Welcome to the Deep Thinkers Newsletter: A collection of essays dedicated to going beyond the surface.
If you’re new here, check out the Deep Thinkers archive.
The other day, I watched an interview with Montell Fish and Omar Apollo (two rising musical artists) that really stuck with me. It was refreshing to see two creatives speak so candidly with one another. They discussed their sexuality, the creative process, and the concept of self-belief.
Below is a short transcript of the part of the conversation that inspired this essay. I highly recommend watching the whole interview (I’ve posted it below).
Montell: Would you say that you have any stubbornness or like—
Omar: Yeah, huge stubbornness.
Montell: But you have to, to like believe in yourself.
Omar: Well, I would say integrity. And as opposed to stubbornness it’s like this is my vision. This is how I would- If I were to have a career, this is how it would look like.
Montell: Yeah.
Omar: And I think that other people create these ideations of what they think of you and what you’re supposed to do. And that could be really really damaging to the process of you creating anything at all.
This interview got me thinking about those who struggle to create what they want. It also reminded me of those who've labored to find clarity in their purpose (me). How many are living a life they never wanted because they've let others influence how they should live? How many have allowed their minds to hold them back from their potential?
I’ve pondered these questions and felt the pull to explore the concept of self-delusion through the lens of integrity. In preparing this essay I reflected on the greats in both ancient and modern times. Many of them, at some point, were thought to be delusional. But without a delusional sense of self-belief, they wouldn't have left their mark on the world.
Think of those who were the first to accomplish anything. Those who were told their goals were impossible or a waste of time. What would our world look like today if they listened to all those voices?
Delusion and integrity
Conventional thinking and rationality are killing our spirit.
As most people mature, caution and comfort take center stage. They quiet their ambitions and stick to the perceived safety of logical thoughts and actions. This is why so many people appear jaded and miserable nowadays. What we all need, especially as we get older, is a bit of self-delusion.
Being delusional isn’t standard advice for improving your life, I get it. But self-delusion is your protection against self-doubt. It’s the armor that protects you against comparison culture. It’s the scope you peer through as you focus on your mission. Delusion nudges you when you’d prefer to wait for the “perfect time.” It insulates you from other’s ideations.
People will project their doubts onto you. Your mind will try to convince you to quit. It will present you with all the logical reasons why your pursuit is in vain and not worth the effort. Yet, it is your unwavering self-belief—the delusion— that defends you against these constraints.
Let’s return to the concept of integrity, which I’d say is itself a form of self-delusion. Others can’t see what you see. When you stand for something contrary to expectations, you might appear crazy. But it’s your integrity that keeps you in motion. Integrity reminds you of the promises you've made to yourself. It reminds you of the person you want to be, not who others expect you to be.
You don’t need anyone’s permission to chase your dreams or experiment with a new direction. You don’t need to be anointed as the chosen one to take a risk and build something nobody has seen before. What you do need is a sense of integrity. What you need is a delusional belief in your code, in your vision for your life.
Whether you’re living for yourself or you’re living to appease others, life is hard. So why play it safe? If you’re suffering in service of bringing your highest self to life, then isn’t the pain worth it?
Excessive realism
Empirical evidence and rationality have been essential to our evolution as a species. I am not here to convince you logic shouldn’t play a role in how you live your life and the decisions you make. But it’s an over-reliance on logic and reason that keeps many people from ever taking a chance on themselves. In other words, without evidence that proves we are capable of accomplishing our dreams, we assume otherwise.
If it’s never happened before and is not happening now, then why would I believe it will happen in the future?
This is excessive realism—the act of looking at your current and past circumstances and assuming this is all there is for you. When you view your potential through the prism of your lived experiences, you cloud your outlook. Instead of viewing the life ahead of you as a blank canvas, you use these lived experiences as a book of evidence for what is possible in your life.
To be clear, I still struggle with this. I don't write to you from an ivory tower where I've completely eradicated this issue from my life. I still have my doubts. I still overthink. But I do it less now. And the more I learn about myself, the easier it becomes to live with integrity.
To be who you're meant to be, remove the shackles of your past. Today's reality is not an indicator of what you're capable of. It is merely a moment in time. Don’t let this moment dictate how all subsequent moments will unfold.
Becoming delusional
Self-delusion defies the limitations set within our society and culture. It’s the voice of your alter-ego—the one that doesn't know how to give up. It’s the side of you that wants to achieve your dreams more than it wants to eat or sleep. The one that doesn't care about the odds. The one who is told there is only a 2% chance of success and all they hear is “There is a chance of success.”
We all need a bit of self-delusion. We need an obsessive ambition for something that pulls us forward, bit by bit, and step by agonizing step.
Below are a few things that have helped me shed some of the baggage that has blocked me from staying true to myself. I hope they can provide you with some guidance as well.
Accept the importance of perception. Your perceptions influence your feelings toward your lived experiences. Two people could share the same challenges and come away with differing sentiments about what they’ve gone through. One could see their challenges as lessons—a means to grow stronger. The other person views their experiences through the lens of a victim. In short, your perception of events is more powerful than the events themselves.
Clarify and define your vision. A lack of forward momentum stems from not only fear or passivity but from a lack of clarity as well. We all need clear goals. Who do you want to be in this life? What kind of people do you want around you? Where do you want to live? What do you want to do for a living? Get clear about what kind of life you want to live.
Connect with your inner child. As kids, there were no limits on our imaginations. There were no barriers to our visions of becoming race car drivers, astronauts, or famous musicians. Our vision for what we could be was boundless. Reconnect with that sense of wonder—that sense of infinite imagination. It’s through the eyes of our inner child that we see all we could ever hope to be.
Live like your ideal self. Waiting for perfect circumstances is a waste of a life. Waiting for the perfect time to share your art. Waiting until you're rich to give to the less fortunate. Waiting for a clear calendar to volunteer your time. We make space for the things we want to do. Being the best version of ourselves doesn’t happen by accident. It happens through intentionality. It happens through consistency. It happens through a (slightly) delusional view of who you are. And it starts today, not in some perfect future.
Keep building
Your ambition can’t fully blossom without some delusion. Believe in yourself in ways nobody else can or will. You have to have your own back. The confines of reality don’t matter when you’re trying to achieve something you’ve never done before or something no one has ever done before.
Logic and reason have their place. They serve their purpose. But they don’t mean much when you’re chasing your dreams. People will tell you to play it safe. Life will throw you into scenarios you’ll have to overcome. No matter what, you can’t let your dreams die.
The only failure is to be the one that doesn’t create. To be the one that doesn’t build. Don’t let the ideations of others influence your plan for your life or your work.
Don’t overthink it. Start building and don’t stop until you’ve built the life you’ve always wanted.
What stood out to me this week:
On rudeness:
Rudeness is the weak man’s imitation of strength.
I worked retail for almost a decade, and I can firmly say I do not, and will never miss it. I learned a lot and made great friends, but working with the general public is challenging, to say the least. One of the biggest hurdles those who work in retail face is rude customers. Contrary to what a rude customer may feel (power, strength, authority), the actual picture is that of weakness, cowardice, and insolence.
Remember, compassion and kindness are the markers of strong character. Let’s all try to lead with these rather than a distorted view of what strength means.
On motivation:
Motivation is not something you wake up with or not. We put ourselves in a trance when we say, ‘I don’t have any motivation.’ Motivation is not something you have; it’s something you do. And it’s entirely sustainable.
- Jim Kwik, Limitless: Upgrade Your Brain, Learn Anything Faster, and Unlock Your Exceptional Life
It’s on you to cultivate motivation. You can’t expect it to come from outside of yourself. Find motivation in your routines and your habits—in what you will do and what you won’t do. Motivation is your superpower, and as Jim Kwik writes, is entirely sustainable.
🎵Song of the week:
Thank you for your time. Let me know how this post resonated with you or share it with a friend.
Stay blessed and enjoy your weekend.
The discussion is fascinating
I love this perspective, Jon. I feel so motivated after reading it.
In my opinion, the "delusion" is our innate belief --> which is why I loved the point about connecting with your inner child.
Somewhere along the way, various people in our lives throttle our expectations of ourselves because they weren't able to achieve their dreams.
We can't let that pierce our bubble of confidence, or delusion as you say.
So valuable and motivating.